I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
you are my new fav person for making him do the walk of shame in pink footie pajamas!
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
When I realized it was a dog, and I still had a boner, it was awkward.
He said my breasts were God's way of making up to him for all the shit he's had to endure in his life.
I can't believe I paid your booty call for a ride home in cake.
I don't know ur idea of a good first date but I'm pretty sure it shouldn't include him holding my hair while I puke in the street
As soon as they started using chocolate milk as a chaser for captain Morgan, I thought l it'd be best to leave.
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
It is a sign that I need a fresh start when Kelly Clarksons new album tells the story of my life.
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
My phone just put together a highlight reel of yesterday's dick pic session, set to music and everything
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
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