Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
her roommate was in the bathroom for over an hour so i volunteered to take the dog out and i shit in the bushes
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
Oh my god, I am the best RA ever. I'm teaching my freshman girls how to deep throat on bananas as a group bonding activity. I'm making the religious ones eat them for potassium.
I didn't ride the struggle bus so much as drive it backwards off a cliff.
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
You couldn't remember her number so you tried to dial her name into your phone. Once you realized you didn't know her name, you dialed 7 random numbers
You FaceTimed me at three in the morning while you were peeing. Your eyes were glazed over and you showed me your bellybutton.
He noticed my new Lipstick so later tonight it's going to be on his dick.
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
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