I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
when she said she would show you her other bow, she ment she wanted you to bend her over and see the tattoo on her lower back you idiot
It's been five and a half years since she and my brother stopped dating. I feel like that's a long enough grace period. Going for it.
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
Best thing law school has taught me: how to use logic to turn a girls "no I will not have sex with you" into "well I might as well get laid"
I've made out with men from every corner of the globe. Sex-wise, I've almost conquered europe. Take that napoleon
We could be the people that go there! Shuffleboard n shit. Meet strippers.
You had me at shuffleboard and strippers
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
What people don't tell you about near death experiences is they give you a full on chub
Would it be considered cannibalistic if I wanted to eat off his bacon tattoo?
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
He's still short.... And probably a douchebag. But if we ever run into him downtown I fully encourage you to take him home and have "I hate you douchebag" sex and lick every inch of that disgustingly toned chest.
Got home & pissed on my moms carpet like a bear in the woods. I woke up to a picture message with me passed out on the floor with my pants down & hands covering my face. I've had an awkward week
I feel like I'm a car that keeps getting Bacardi 151 instead of fuel
The ass gains better be worth it
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