i hate that you can chart my weight gain through my facebook pictures.
I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR.
she's using motion activated glade air fresheners as some sort of early warning system
I'm sorry I can't get drinks with you. I have to make sure my dad doesn't go to jail.
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
I woke up to find my purse full of puke, and all I could think was not again.
The light burnt out and he thinks the power is out in the whole house. He is cooking a hog dog over two candles. I'm gonna see if he'll make me one
I just almost said to a customer "P as in Pussy"
Just thinking about this summer makes me feel a slight tingle of an orgasm mixed with a twinge of regret as the cold ghostly feeling of multiple hangovers creep into my body.
He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
I'm home now if you wanna come over.
Sloane just tried to lick my eyeball. I'm going to regain my composure then I'll be there.
He said it was the classiest hand job he ever had because my nails were painted red. We need to go to nicer bars from now on.
i think i puked but i couldve been a dream and i may have madeout with a 20 something guy infront of my managers...also possible dream.
Greetings from Florida; the armpit of the US, where my 240something lb brother nearly got carried away by some aggressive woodland mosquitoes. I was only spared because they could probably sense I was currently semi-disassociating and would not feel the suffering their presence wrought.
Anyway, how was your day?
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