i just wanna soil my oats bro
At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
Looks like I will be paying for the roofie I slipped myself in 9 months.
It was so delicious I was introducing it to people. Guy from my psych class was like "This is my girlfriend, Erica," and I was like, "This is my milkshake, Oreo."
Apparently she came home completely covered in mud, pretending to be a bird...and she still had more sex than any of us this weekend.
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
We were fucking at break-dick speeds.
This family outing has commenced with me throwing up in an apple orchard
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
I have what looks like a rubber stamp mark on my cock from last night that says "Magic Marla Approved" Do we know a Marla?
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
I'm making mistakes. Coming up with girl now
I hate me. That girl was hiiiiideous.
Also, why does our bed smell like mayonnaise?
I am mildly hung over. Decided pants are very unnecessary right now.
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
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