Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
She's like Mona Lisa when she's intoxicated. No one understands her but they all think she's marvelous
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
He was the one that got away. From my vagina.
Listening to Ke$ha's new single to pump myself up for my STD test.
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
I should come with a disclaimer that reads "bad at relationships and defensive when confronted about it"
or maybe "WARNING: picks fights when bored"
I'm too old for chlamydia. That's for 20 year olds who go to clubs and do drugs I've never heard of.
I made a joke about The Hemingway being a really boring sex position where you blandly describe all the action and then kill yourself after you orgasm. He stopped responding. I've GOT to stop talking to everyone like they're you.
Drunk you wants to be petty, not you you.
The cards I get dealt on tinder now are karma for fucking a married man while I was in high school.
Randomize
