At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
I swear, if I find out you're lying, I'm going to put your name on one of those herpes watch websites and put the link up on every social networking site in existence.
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
just saw your exgirlfriend at the mall. her sister is pretty hot.
called that a week into the relationship. like driving off the lot with a 2010 and seeing the 2011 models coming in on the truck.
Let me just say....i'm sorry about setting your carpet on fire. I had no idea that the paper towel would burn that quickly.
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
I just took a shower and found half a cookie melted under my boob. Please tell me there's a reason
I accidentally flashed three cops last night. Stone cold sober.
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
I mean we don't talk anymore but I still see him around wearing that sweater he stole from me after we had sex
I'm just the girl with the breathalyzer keychain, and I embrace that.
Opening my shipments of mascara and nipple pasties this morning like a boss bitch
A world without bacon flavored condoms is not one I want to live in.
I literally blew him under my face mask. Not because I thought it'd protect me from COVID, but because I wanted to prove to myself that I could.
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