Thursdays are my worst days
but now we sippin champagne when we thirstay?
I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
He saw my tits then looked up and yelled thank you jesus as loud as he could
He walked in, tore open the drawer, pulled out a condom, and slammed it shut. He was that ready.
You couldve had sex with 2 drunk chicks on an alligator slide.
I'm soaked in champagne. I'm eating oatmeal from mcdonalds tonight was glorious
Wow. This hand sanitizer smells awesome. It's like I just gave a handjob to a fruit basket.
Dude you were so high some kid was kicking the wall and you were convinced it was your heartbeat
i want to go make food but i'll have to face my mom after telling her that the random i'm sleeping with, whose name i don't know, told me I was "too slutty to be his girlfriend" when i was drunk last night
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
starting to feel like a fuck wizard with a magical sixth sense for people fucking.
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
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