i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
just told my mom that i'm having a bad day and she responded with "maybe you should pour yourself a nice drink". good to know that my parents support my future of alcoholism
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
i found two dead squirrels on my front step this morning.. do you think they have something to do with my missing phone?
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
malibu coconut giveth, and malibu coconut taketh away
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
I'm tired of stuffing my fat into a slutty costume. Next year let's go as homeless girls. Cute ones. In leggings with camel toe.
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
also dude totally apologize for the whole drunken "want something in my mouth" text
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
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