She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
he thought i was a dude.
he asked me if i "normally slept like that" because i was curled up in a ball facing the wall. then he told me that i woke up in the middle of the night and said "oh my god. i forgot you were here." how did he not understand that i didn't want him in my bed.
I'm not saying he has herpes, I'm just saying he slept with my friend that has herpes.
I should have taken pre-gaming this lunch date more seriously.
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
I'm gonna let my dick speak for itself from now on. Seriously, it's always recruiting for me even after 6 hours of drinking.
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
I'm serious-it was like trying to deep-throat a minivan.
Grandma cant send me 4 lbs of gummi bears and expect me not to soak them in some sort of alcohol
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
Randomize
