Sponge bath it is.
I saw him on the jumbotron, its like god doesnt want me to forget his tiny penis
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
So I just tried to wake him up with a blow job and he literally touched the top of my head and said snooze button
I almost got away with it until she smelled beer on the stroller.
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
You kept saying,"there's a seahorse in my stomach, who's trying escape". This was after the curtains attacked you.
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
I want to wear Christmas sweaters with you.
All I have in my new place is coke and a treadmill.. it's workout Wednesday
You have set the bar insurmountably high with apple pie and buttsex.
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
Good god, my descendants are going to be fucked.
Its weird to introduce me to his wife and kids on the first date, right?
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
Randomize
