im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
So instead of getting the if-you-hurt-my-little-girl-youre-dead talk, i got the alcohol-is-our-friend talk, i like her dad already
She said I wasn't helping her abandonment issues by not responding to her texts at 4 am
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
We're both clumsy. What does this imply for our kids?
Helmets.
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
Welp. June's off to a great start. I just ripped my pants, completely sober, at 10:30 p.m.
The last thing I remember before blacking out was passing that sobriety test.
The sad moment you remember you have no power for a week and can't flush.....
Wrong number bro but that sounds like a damn shame.
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
Can I say it was a great night out of town? Fucking my co-worker in the hotel bed while my best friend is fucking his friend on the floor and a random guy is laying in the other bed meanwhile we are all passing a joint back and forth
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
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