i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
Dude, we're at Einstein's Bagels and the dude next to us is spreading cannabutter on his bagel.
I remember sitting there at the toilet, bleeding everywhere and thinking, "I walked from my bedroom to here. What happened?"
I'm going to superglue stuart's hands into socker boppers
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
We legitimately thought something was wrong with you until someone pointed out you were just doing the thriller dance
Where are you? I hear fireworks and you've gone missing. I'm sure that is not coincidence.
It's twenty thirteen and the rando and I bonded over the fact that we're both stil using flip phones. Of course I fucked him in the bathroom. It was the obvious thing to do.
Remind me to tell you how I've been deaf since Sunday at 1245
At IHOP. It feels weird and sad that your cleavage isn't here for me to try to toss paper wads into.
How the fuck did we end up at a strip club last night.. We started the night playing bingo at a church
Please tell your friend to stop shitting in my closet.
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