Ok never mind. Thought i pooped my pants for a second. False alarm.
is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
so her cute freckles turned out to be blackheads
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
I found a vibrator in my car and it's not mine...this is becoming a weird day.
I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers
look at his last status update. 3:41 a.m. "i love u and miss u already egg burrito. happy trails friend." OF COURSE HE SMOKES POT.
You need to stop blackout tweeting at him to have sex with you on the roof of your dorm. He doesn't even have a twitter.
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
If you've ever wanted to get filthy in a Catholic church before 2 on a Wednesday, I might be your guy.
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
I had a dream about that dude. It was the first time I had a dream about him since the tryst.
The tryst?
The hookup. I like using sophisticated words for my foolish decisions. Makes me retain some dignity.
My grandpa is driving me to get condoms and wine. This is adulthood.
I asked him if we were exclusive and he followed up with, "If a tree falls in the woods and no ones around, does it still make a sound?" Wtf am I supposed to do with that?!
Randomize
