the new term for farting is butt boxing.
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
Woke up in a pool of alcohol sweat. Probably could wring out my sheets and make a decent cocktail.
I feel like one of those toads that you lick to get high or find a prince.... cept when you lick me you find a drunk whore.
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
please don't go to jail. I'd hate to have to call the montgomery county jail every time I need sex advice
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
Can I just say I love that you have a kegorator on your wedding registry?
I'm watching my cat lick a used condom wrapper on my nightstand and I'm too hungover to move and do anything about it. Tequila Tuesdays can not be a thing.
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
We had a company shotgunning beers contest in the parking lot today, and I won. God bless America!
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