I just got stood up by an 18 yr old. fmylife.
Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
I remember spending $50 at Ozzie's on Friday...my Visa remembers $120.
you were sleeping on the floor, then you woke up and told me you were not comfy enough. You took the carpet in the bathroom put it in the bath and you slept there.
There's somethin not right about having to take the batteries out of your 27 year old boyfriends gameboy to use in your vibrator
You owe me new eyes. The ones I have are burned with your balls into the back of my eyes. And every time I close them, your balls are right there...
I was expecting a blowjob when she shoved me in the bathroom but instead she shaved my pubes into a mustache for my penis. I am still satisfied.
I made a Wendy's employee say fuck this and quit because I started flipping out due to a baked potato shortage. Of course I had a good night
fat people need to stop using the handicapped bathroom stall so I can have sex in it. it's common logic
I told my doctor about us having twin chlamydia
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
So my dad just asked, "did you leave without pants a lil bit ago?"
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