You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
someone put bongwater in my humidifier again THIS NEEDS TO STOP
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
I loved your drunken rendition of "I wanna dance with somebody" that you left on my voicemail last night.
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
She walked home carrying a six pack of beer and someone elses cat
SHE BETTER HAVE BROUGHT BACK MY FUCKING COUCH CUSIONS OR SHES GUNNA GET IT.
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
Hey, I shot that toilet dead center, drunk, from at least 6 ft away. I'm a fuckin awesome shot. You guys were completely safe.
Yes, that toilet won't be hurting anyone anymore.... Hahaha
I'm calling in my "fuck at anytime anywhere" card. Meet me at my place in 20 min, wear your Waldo costume.
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
My Sundays are fucking awful. Can't get a blow job.....can't get a win.
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
Randomize
