I'm laying in your front yard are you home
I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
So he sent me a text that said "say hi to your vajayjay for me"
Was there any message he wanted you to relay to your asshole?
What did you want me to do? You know I don't like fat people. I'm an asshole to them sober it only gets worse when I'm drunk
That doesn't make it okay! You tried kicking the girl's mom out where we were having the party at!
I wish we never smoked. I'm literally laying in bed opening and closing my eyes, just hoping a hot dog stand will appear in the room.
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
We're lucky we aren't prostitutes by now. Whats the etiquette for returning a pair of heels with blood on them?
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
Who the fuck superglued glowsticks to my arm.
We were all in the pool and he showed up with a pitcher of margarita. Everyone swam over to him. He poured it directly into our mouths like we were a Sea World act.
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
NO BABIES. YOUR VAGINA WILL BLEED WITHIN A FORTNIGHT.
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
I just woke up with a pair of handcuffs in my pants, can u explain this?
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