I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
oh no you fucking didn't eat my mac and cheese you cunt
You kept telling me to "raw dog" your take home breathalyzer without the mouthpiece
I just remembered I gave $20 to a bum last nite. Philanthropy events always make me do stupid shit.
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
I hit a bug from across the room with my flip flop boomerang style. That awesome.
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
I just tried to brush my hair with a can opener. Who gave you that brownie
Hey, sorry I choked you last night... I was just really excited to see you.
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