pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
as soon as his mom opened the door to let me in the house she asked if i would like a shot
it's gonna be a great weekend
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
it was like watching bambi learning to walk, if bambi was 22 and a high functioning alcoholic.
Because you know it would be fucking amazing to get trashed and shatter the dreams of 12 year old girls. I might get a shirt.
You may see me wearing your shirt to class. It's because I still have the spins and I'm anticipating throwing up on it. Asshole.
If your wondering why there is a puddle on the floor is I may have decided to make a kiddie pool in your living room.
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
I also know you puked in your shoe.
That would explain the note .... I apparently wrote myself an apology note from drunk to sober me .... saying "sorry for the fancy shoe soup" .... ugh I'll never drink again ...
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
A good example of deductive reasoning: Knowing that when my girlfriend texts me "I promise not to smoke all your weed!" that she is...at that VERY moment...Smoking All Of My Weed.
Randomize
