Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
Remeber, hes got nothing better to offer you than drunk words and hairy balls.
And whoever invented the condom should be put to death.
Not complaining, but why is there a Russian chick downstairs making latkes?
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
I'm laying in bed listening to Purple Rain on repeat. If you wanna bone, come up, but if not, at least Prince understands me.
I offered to lick your vagina while wearing a suit... Pretty sure chivalry is well alive.
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
You tried paying your tab with the coaster
It took 5 bourbons for him to handcuff and spank me and then he cried after sex. The men that like me are so unstable.
Her cat was breathing in my ear all night, like that kid from Hey Arnold.
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
When he identified himself as captain clitoris i knew my night was fucked.
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
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