the stripper made me go home becuz she had to take her kid to a birthday party in the morning
after a month anything with tits is on the radar
you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
At least a dozen asian tourists will be showing their friends pictures of me peeing off of Hoover Dam with a cop pointing his gun at me when they get home. I worry about the impact on their children.
Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
I just found her phone in the quesadilla maker...
I'm also glad were at the point in our friendship where my vagina talking to you isn't weird
Nah I'm perfectly content solely banging the married bartender once a week.
That's practically a relationship for you
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
The ratio of last drink to last smoke is so tricky. This could go on until the booze is gone
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
He got the life proof phone case so he could jack off in the shower without his wife knowing
So I have now fucked both my roommates...This is why I can’t live with men.
Randomize
