its good she wears the same dress to all the weddings so we can track how fat she's really gotten
so glad i banged her when she was skinny
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
The gay bar tender told me I looked like Prince William. And that I needed my balls licked.
you want your laptop back?
are you giving me my laptop back, or cashing in on our break up sex?
both.
come over.
I walked in and you were laying on the floor bleeding everywhere half asleep half crying and moe was at the kitchen table eating frozen pizza refusing to acknowledge you. What a sight.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
I'm going to get like 25 drinks at their wedding and just leave them sitting around or give them to hobos.
I BIT YOU IN THE DINING ROOM. I bit you and you crunched
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
I don't know what you slipped me, but my TV is vomming blood right now. Thanks, jerkoff.
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
we promised ourselves we wouldn't get too drunk, and what happens? I wake up the next morning with half a mcdouble in one pocket and some barbie clothes in the other.
I have 2 bottles of wine, a sharpie, and a panda mask and don't have to wake up early. Can u do the math on this?
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
Randomize
