and before you know it i was laying next to him at 2 in the morning with penis and sadness on my breath.
I've never been 12-exclamation-point-excited for sex. That must have been good.
so we told my parents we were going trick or treating. got high as shit at some playground. and then bought our own candy so we looked legit when we got home.
too bad being hungover isnt a job. just threw up from 9am to 5pm
So I went outside my house this morning and basically my entire front lawn is covered in gummi bears... I think that involves you guys.
And then you gave the bride a high five and said "Go forth and Consummate."
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
So he was supposed to be helping me with my math but instead we ended up drinking coconut rum in his basement and having sex. I think my mom was right, getting a tutor will be good for me. Relieves the stress.
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
He said he only likes girls with a sense of humor, after he took his pants off I understood why
Running into your random closeted hookup from last night is really awkward when you have to sit next to him and his girlfriend in a 200 person class.
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
I feel like I should send her I'm sorry I've been fucking your boyfriend flowers.
Rationing the toilet paper. Only one wipe allowed. I'm scared to move too much.
Randomize
