Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
Do you ever close your eyes when your having sex with your girlfriend and pretend she didn't get fat after high school?
the black eye was caused by a 12 year old girl in a vampire costume who punched you in the face after you aggresively screamed "TEAM JACOB!" in her face & howled at the moon...
do you remember the combo for the lock to my pants?
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
I don't mean to complain but you could have done a better job of keeping me alive last night
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
I've sold more douches working here than one man should sell in a lifetime
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
hurry there's a jack Daniels slip n slide and clothes are coming off faster than I can even comprehend oh thank god for autocorrect
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
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