You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
Vodka and Eggs at 9:30AM = thank you, America.
Imagine a baby lion feeding on an injured gazelle and it tasting fresh blood for the first time. That's me and this breakfast sammich
I fell asleep at the bar. And the bouncer threw a snowball at my face.
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
I knew we would be good together when you made me lick jameson off your boob while you screamed along with racks on racks
So fucking hammered. Is this all spelled right? I'm holding it up to my eye. I am on a boulder. I feel like an owl
Just did an entire nights worth of bar crawl in an hour. Boom
my ass is still wet. this is highly unpleasant. give me 5 to get changed and I'm all yours. or you can yell things to me while I shower and burn clothes
Doesn't matter if you work at a funeral home. If the boss says get a keg, you get a keg.
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
You’ll (maybe) appreciate that I picked at my ingrown hair again. Quarantine updates are getting BLEAK.
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