I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
So, do you know where my left shoe is? I mean, we were at a few places last night, and I called them. No luck for me.
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
He had a shameless baby voice when he was talking to my dog. There's no way I'm making it through the night with my clothes on.
I'm not really sure what went on in my mouth last night but right now it tastes like what I can only imagine is a mixture of astroglide and peanut butter. You hungry?
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
I need to beat up a magician now. BRB.
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
Trust me, dating 38 and 20 year old dudes at the same time is the best. Money plus all of the sex. Finally figured out this relationship thing.
Dude I was tripping acid when she was crying and I literally couldn't defend myself
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
SPICY FOODS AND BLOWJOBS DON'T MIX.
YOU SAID YOU'D TRY ANYTHING ONCE YOU LIAR
Randomize
