I got chris browned last night
Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
Woke up this morning with a note saying "great sex, see you never". Why can't I meet more women like her?
there's a guy in the del taco parking lot doing pushups. let's be his friends
You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
Guess who just got caught by mall security having sex in a car in the parking lot... at noon. This chick.
If it meant we had chicks like that every weekend I would gay marry the shit out of you dude
Use "feeling words"
Yay
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
I'm gonna try Jim's breakup remedy this weekend.
Is that the one where you drink 3 cases of beer and rewatch as much WWE RAW as you can find? Or the one where you hookup with fatties on Craigslist?
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
You were crying hysterically
So that's why my heels were in the oven...
she just kept pointing at the cows and calling them field penguins
Randomize
