it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
You also had the stripper slap the shit out of me for not having any money....remember that?
I wish they had nachos that got you drunk
Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
Highlight of the day: realizing the man in the car next to mine was getting road head... at 2:45pm... nicely done sir, nicely done.
i just wanna lock my vagina in a safe filled with bandaids and healthy things
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
no one was sober enough to set up jenga so we just threw the pieces at the last person to drink
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
Also was told that I was her "third favourite booty call" - I'm taking this a good thing right?
It's a podium place so yeah...
I just find it funny that nobody ever threatens to call the cops on us until we have a Harry Potter party
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
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