I literally just saw a campus policeman riding a Segway pull over a moving car. you should just give up.
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
you wore rainboots all night because you said the forecast called for wine spillage
its sad that I know 23 beers will fit into my purse
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
is it too much for me to say that i have a ziplock bag with ice in it in my underwear?
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
If you saw or spoke to me yesterday can you message me. Trying to make a timeline of the day I was too drunk to remember
BITCH I AM EXPERIENCING THE FEMININE MYSTERY SHUT UP AND GIVE ME DRUGS
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
The fact that I made out with a twenty one year old father is kind of worrying me now. Like. This is exactly what I wasn't supposed to do in life.
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
Randomize
