I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
Just remembered i had an ordained minister bless my booze last night.
Mom just Facebook checked into an Applebees at 2am. Caption: ''WITH THE BESTIEZ.''
I want a grilled cheese and an IV
Until then we have the self affirmation from retweets and nights alone with pizza..
Also, what is a socially acceptable way to introduce a crossbow in public?
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
I drunk-cried for all conjoined twins everywhere the other day.
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
You don't know commitment until you try and waterproof a non-waterproof vibrator
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
I'm going to be fiscally responsible and buy a handle.
We're at the liquor store. Then going to the hospital
She caught me by google maps... Lets just say it wasnt her car in front of the house.
Randomize
