Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
Why do I fail so hard at ironing, when I'm a woman and i should be amazing at it?
because god found you far too good at oral sex and had to make all things even?
hey. who tried to drive me home last night?
not sure. we got lost. what do you mean "tried"?
i'm still in their car. parked on the beach. no one else is here. i have on different pants.
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
I'm in my boyfriends bathroom and I shit so bad, there was no toilet paper but his mom's clothes were on the floor and I wiped my butt on her underwear... now it looks like she sharted
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
The thing is you're all "holy crap this isn't nearly as bad as I thought pissing on my own face would be."
I told the girl who was peeing in the garbage can she must have had a lot of upper body strength.
I have got to stop getting laid on my lunch breaks. I AM SO HUNGRY RIGHT NOW.
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
didn't prepare for this snow storm at all. i only have like 6 beer and all my booty calls already went home for the holiday. this is bull.
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Randomize
