yeah i like to chase my xanax with prozac and then viagra. you're up...and then you're UP
I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
My therapist says she wants to work on my 'trust issues'. I think she's found the cash cow within.
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
He blended the pizza with water and drank the whole thing. He is my hangover hero
I didn't ride the struggle bus so much as drive it backwards off a cliff.
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
I don't know bro. If a girl makes you cum hard enough that you pull a back muscle, she might be the perfect one to call for a massage on said muscle.
Do u ever find yourself high af, watching American ninja warrior and crying at the athletes stories?
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
Did you happen to find the other half of my bra last night?
It’s the biggest dick I’ve ever seen. His IQ drops 25 points when he’s hard because there’s no blood going to his brain
I can't take 'get a man' advice from you. You'll stick your penis in a warm banana peel.
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