he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
My cousins just decided to make a catapult to spread my Grandpa's cremated remains. I love my family.
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
She trust falled out of a window. It was like that scene from A Little Princess but with a lot more blood.
The good thing about having holes in your nose from all the drugs you do is that you can't smell nasty things. Like puke.
Puked in the trees at home depot, I told everyone it was fertilizeerr
If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave
Add caroling to the list of things we need to do in an elevator
It's a fucking menopause festival down here at the strike zone
The only times we have to apologize in this friendship is when you intentionally punch me and that's only happened once so it's okay
After last night I never want to be in the back of a cop car again. No leg room.
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
Randomize
