so it turns out you can rearrange the letters in "scottsdale" to spell "milf city." who knew?
If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
if another girl says "im usually cleaner down there" I'm just going to shoot myself
I went for the touchdown every play, and I think I ended up with herpes.
I'm bakin' bread in my pussy!
What?
I have a yeast infection.
Now there are two cop cars. If I go to jail I just would like to thank you for making me wear boxers.
I fell asleep to the sounds of them banging in the next room. It was oddly soothing...
And on that day, Satan said; "Let there be the friend zone and let us get fucking high." while Jesus silently cried in the background.
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
The day I let him eat me out will be the day that Donald trump is an honest, kind, non-bigoted member of society
Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
Randomize
