clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
hey soul. what's that? you, dignity and pride are left for the night? coulda told me that before i vomited all over my mother.
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
Also, our mothers are placing bets on which of us will get pregnant first.
i had to pay fifty dollars for throwing up in the limo, 60 fucking dollars to throw up all over myself
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
its really sad that i have to specifically make this a rule but, absolutely no lighting smoke bombs indoors at my birthday party.
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
I'm in the fetal position watching the little mermaid and trying not to die. When do you come home?
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
I think the sex rug burn on my back is infected, can you check it out when you get home?
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
Randomize
