If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
70 feet underwater and I sharted my wetsuit, Tide pen won't clean this up.
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
She gave me a rubber ducky to make me feel better while I was throwing up.
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
Sorry for eating those cheese fries out of your hands last night
I have bruises all over from falling so much last night, I even have bruises on my arms from them picking me up off the street.. Oh vodka nights.
BURNT NIPPLES ARE UNHAPPY NIPPLES.
Damn why is there no horse blowjob emoji?
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
Just walked into the library with a case of Strawberitas in hand.. no one said a word.. I think they were just impressed I knew where the library was
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
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