Ryan just walked out of his frat house with a case of beer, a 6 dollar bottle of vodka, and a pillow. He's good to go.
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
It's like being the dunk pilot of a plane full of pornstars and drunkenness.
I'm having flashbacks from last night. Did I admit to pausing Whitney's funeral because I was watching porn? I believe I did.
IF HE CAN'T EVEN MAKE EYE CONTACT IN CLASS, I DOUBT THERE WILL BE OTHER FORMS OF CONTACT ON OUR FIRST NOT-A-DATE DATE
Just talked a homeless guy out of suicide. Was rewarded with a garbage bag full of mountain dew bottles and zannies. Im such a good person
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
I just came inside of a Gatorade bottle. That hungover.
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
Can we go out and get blitzed in celebration that they'll be no more surprise kids
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
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