Flying to Orlando on the 7th is cheaper than the 8th by like three margaritas.
i don't think my family understands the severity of a twenty first birthday.
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
Just come back with most of your limbs...and your dick. Please and thank you
Too lazy to get out of my bed thats 2 feet away from you. Are you sure youre alright?
You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
In other more interesting news I'm going to arrange a surprise orgy. You in?
Hostess is going out of business we'll never survive the apocalypse
Almost ran over girl selling candy bars for charity. Pretty much obligated to buy at that point.
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
Did we seriously just get into a fist fight over kit kats?
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
Wow i just puked in front of the lady that was drug testing me. I passed though!
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
Randomize