i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
Little spoons don't ask big questions
Picking up third year law school girls is like MILF hunting for beginners
Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
I asked you if you were ok and you said "dude I'm fine, I'm in the recovery position"
i walked outside and you were driving up the stairs to her apartment
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
Man I was just the closest I've ever been to crapping my pants.
there’s plenty of nice guys out there with good jobs and NO felonies!
I'm gonna fight the coyote
And with one simple text you can separate the men from the boys...."it's that time of the month."
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
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