Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
mrs. f**** your sons in jail, if you can help with bail please respond, if not please dont tell him i told you.
We had to use the stains on Phil's shirt to try to piece together what happened last night.
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
I've taken to hiding pictures of us around his room so that he'll forever feel guilty for dumping me on Valentine's Day... And to potentially cock block any hook ups.
You were jumping on the trampoline and screaming that you couldn't feel the fire.
Brought him brownies before taking his pants off. I'm like the Martha fucking Stewart of booty calls. Walk of shame be damned.
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
All I've had today is a brownie and a shot of Jack, so you know. I'm doing ok.
Robert just walked in drunk, grabbed my Jameson from me, told me to let him do his thing, and spilled it all over the coffee table. Then he told me to grab a funnel because he was going home.
I woke up and there was pizza slices on the fucking walls of my room
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
Lighting a fucking bong with a candle. Straight up dedication.
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