Dogs love guiness but it fucks up their kidneys
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
I woke up on a raft in a bath tub filled with beer. excellent night.
So apparently when I was 2, I went around drinking everybody's beer at some wedding, then passed out in a corner....
This explains a lot.
I don't think the cop knew you were on ecstasy until you asked for a back rub.
on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window
Am I texting you while being used as a stripper pole by two half-naked women? hint: I am.
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
The fact that when I blacked in you were sober enough to kick me out of your roommates bed makes me question our friendship.
The bartender seems to not like the DD's anymore. I'm sad
multitasking: i'm now sitting up and smoking my joint.
I don't care. She's the only girl to make me feel like my face is melting when she blows me.
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
Hey what you doing tonight?
Working at the hospital! So hurt yourself and come visit :)
See you in about a hour
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