He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
I feel like my life has just been one 21 year long episode of "i shouldn't be alive"
Truelife: I made out with my ex-boyfriend's girlfriend this weekend. Thank you Captain Morgan...
Was she wearing cherry chapstick??
No. Life's not always a fairytale.....
you fully convinced the taxi driver that we were in a race
I have got to stop assigning last names to girls I get numbers from based on what I think will remind me of them... Sarah Petrydish is not an acceptable memory trigger
OMG OMG OMG DID YOU KNOW THERE ARE MINI CHOCOLATE COWBOY HATS THAT MEN CAN BUY FOR THEIR PENISES?
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me"
Spotify knows me way to well. You mention swinger club and guess what it shuffles to? Danger Zone by Kenny Loggins
He smacked my ass so hard my ass cheek looks like Wilson from Cast Away
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
How does one get out of sexting without being rude? I'm trying to watch Downtown Abbey
she grabed my junk and started making lightsaber noises
I wonder if you could get her in a metal bikini
Stoner thoughts are the only thoughts I want to have now.
Randomize
