i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
I think she just stepped in a piece of mac and cheese, picked it off the bottom of her foot and ate it.
They turned the water off again. Brushed my teeth with whats left from those pitchers of mojitos. So hung over i dont even care.
Postcard from jail please. Reserving a spot on my fridge.
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
You're asking your pregnant booty call to go to a funeral with you?
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
Now we're discussing the sex we had and the later lack thereof. It's like marriage counseling via snapchat.
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
The neighbors ahemed the WHOLE time. Their kids are the ones that scream loud enough for me to remember my birth control. It's payback!
I'm cuddly bitch. Deal with it.
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