Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
she said "can't you just pull out and cum on my face? I hate scooping jizz out of my vag".
I'm assuming you texted me by mistake. you're not jizzing in or on me again, thanks for playing, douchebag.
Apparently she held up my head the entire 40 minutes, convincing the cab driver that I was okay
What ever happened to the whole 'innocent until proven guilty' thing. Like 'not pregnant until proven pregnant'. That's how it should be...
I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying
Nothings harder than putting on a frozen condom.. or should I say softer
Bless her heart. Her stupid, drunk, adderall-ed heart.
You know, we cock-blocked like 5 people last night. It's like we're her vagina goalies
I feel like I owe her child an apology or something after blowing my load on the tattoo she has of her.
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
My car has a permanent smell of sex to it now.
I'll probably just end up banging you in your parents marital bed,in their honor of course.
you told us the chicken was mocking you, then proceeded to explain that every time someone reads your mind you accidentally think of something sexual
Randomize
