After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
His best friend's cat died so we had a drunken burial ceremony on the side of his condo at 2am and I'm pretty sure if anyone gets ahold of the video feed from Martini Monday we're all fired.
My younger brother just got high fives from all my guy cousins for fucking my best friend. I hate family gatherings.
Weird come down, just saw a woman on the train go to grab something and realised she had terrifying hands. They literally filled me with dread. I don't think I'm ok.
So you're on like a list there now..."Do not under any circumstances give this person a knife. Serve them in plastic cups ONLY"
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
He added me on LinkedIn while I was baking weed brownies in the boxers he left here... Is this adulthood?
A toast to whoever set this year's daylight savings fallback to the day after halloween, granting us another hour to detox before we pretend to be functional adults. Clearly, a partier with forethought and clear priorities. Cheers!
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
Kinda. I got kicked outta the bar, and then incited a riot until the cops came and I bailed
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
Randomize
