where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
You fell asleep leaning on my shoulder at the bar
Tell her to buy some booze and drink away her sorrows like an adult.
The bartender said he wanted to turn you gay, and we got free shots the rest of the night
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
Going back to the ever classy sneak out to the fridge and swig liquor from the bottle method. That it is legal for me to drink here makes the fact that I have to do this all the more depressing.
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
You grabbed my shirt and said, "hope you're not attached" and ripped it off before I could answer you.
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
What happened last night? I'm too scared to get out of bed and see the destruction.
First of all, check to see if that naked guy is still alive. He didn't look to be breathing when I left
Dude my toilet did not deserve what I just did to it
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
Yeah everywhere i go i feel like a 3rd or 5th or (2n+1)th wheel. That's right, i'm a mathematically depressed drunk.
Randomize
