? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
Let's hear it for middle of the street handjobs ladies and gentlemen
Yet again my drunken self has managed to find his way into the middle of nowhere with no shoes or recollection of what happened last night.
Then I guess you don't remember me driving you there after you tried making out with my girlfriend, dipshit.
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
Dude, the cops never think it's as funny as you do.
If I started a story with "That three-year-old totally deserved it," would you listen?
Sometimes I seriously wonder if I could get away with vodka Sundays at work. Cuz this red bull feels naked.
I'd love to sympathize with you but I'm drunk in a mansion
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
Is it a bad sign starting the new year off naked, wet, and alone?
Asking for a friend of course
Wait... so you had sex and then your ear drum ruptured? I'm not sure if I want to ask if the two are related...
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
Grandpa just whipped it out and started pissing on the way to the game stuck in traffic. I saw EVERYTHING. :(
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
Randomize
