Its about making memories worth repressing
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
btw, i had a dream i drank 260-proof vodka last night. thank god that doesn't exist in real life.
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
the doctor said its the kinda of pregnant you dont recover from
You told me if you could get your shoes on, you deserved a coke and rum. We never made it to the party.
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
Apparently I yelled "Spring Break 1984" at a drunk couple fighting on the side of the road.
Are you ok?
They gave me a cat until I fall asleep. His name is fluffy because he's fluffy.
I think the reason she hasn't text me back is because I spanked her ass with Hulk Hands
You are an awesome peach made of glitter.
my confident boosted when he told me that it was I who started making out with him. ME. NOT HIM.
I AM SHOCKED AND PROUD OF MYSELF
I just got CPR certified, don't make me need these skills so soon
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
Randomize
