Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
He threw up over the balcony and blamed it on an invisible garden gnome.
I just got hit by a car. I'm fine; I'll be to the bars in about 15
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
what better way to celebrate the birth of jesus christ than to get embarrassingly intoxicated and make poor decisions!?
forgot to tell you your neighbor walked out of her house this morning just as I was leaving shirtless
we panicked because we couldn't find you anywhere, but then we found you tripping in the bathtub with Marie's cat. there was no water. you thought there was water, though.
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
When I walked out of the bathroom and you were literally dancing, you looked at me and said 'this is how I dance'. And then continued.
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
Do you just want me to shit in a Jack-o-latern
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
Randomize
